Speak nicely to your kids

Yelling, swearing, and/or calling your children names can take a toll on their behavior and mental health. Make a point to keep your anger in check and remember that how you talk to your kids matters.

Harsh verbal discipline includes shouting, screaming, swearing, and/or name-calling. By some estimates, nearly half of parents speak severely to their kids. They sometimes do so out of desperation, especially when they’re frustrated and/or angry—or they simply feel that nothing else is working.

So what’s the end result? Parents could get what they “want,” but it might only be for the short-term. Even worse, kids’ mental health and self-esteem could suffer. Children who are exposed to shouting and swearing tend to develop poor behavior. Kids and teens on the receiving end of yelling, cursing, and name-calling tend to be more physically aggressive too. And they could struggle socially.  

Discipline is about teaching kids to manage their behavior and letting them know you’re worried when they make a bad choice. It's also about keeping them safe. Discipline isn’t about winning battles or calling your children humiliating names.

If you follow these 5 steps for managing your anger, you’ll be well on your way to developing a more effective and positive approach to disciplining your kids. Try becoming more mindful of your emotions rather than letting them drive your behavior.

Make your children’s emotional health a priority. Parenting for Service Members and Veterans suggests a positive approach to discipline begins with a strong relationship between you and your kids. Constantly on the go? Download the Parenting2Go app for helpful tips when you’re on the road.  


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